November 12, 2011

My Favourite Comment of the Day

By Lady Amethyst responding to LA Monster's absurd rationalization of the insanely priced items from Gaga's Workshop at Barney's.
 
Lady Amethyst has left a new comment on your post "It's a Christmas for Suckers at Barney's!":



The $25 yo-yo from Gaga's Workshop. 
...LA Monster, there is no fucking way you are this stupid...I am going to pretend you were high on meds when you typed the following quotations, but will also still respond:

 
"25% to a worthy cause means you paid 19 dollars"
 
No, you *still* paid $25 whole dollars, sugar crumb...THIS AMOUNT IS NOT TAX DEDUCTIBLE TO YOU (says it right on the site)!! It is tax deductible to BARNEY'S and GAGA!! YOU are covering this cost 100%.

"8 dollars for shipping, means you paid 11 dollars!"

Golly gee whiz holy fuckin' smokes, what a deal!! ...if you are a FUCKING MORON!!
'Tis the season, bitch. 'Tis the season of FREE HOLIDAY SHIPPING or $4.99 FLAT RATE GROUND SHIPPING WITHIN THE CONTINENTAL USA!!!! I can't believe you are this fucking stupid...The shipping rates are falling in line to compete with everyone else during the season. Nothing more. Try ordering it from Canada & see just how "giving" the shipping rates are...


"Complementry gift wrapping hmmm, I have paid at least 10 dollars at a nice shopping mall (but I did include a tip)"
You, my dear, were heavily shafted. Let's put this in perspective: You were paying $10 for the employee, supplies, taxes, etc. Basically, all of the overhead. But here's the hilarious thing when it's free: it is ALWAYS worked into the cost of the item. Don't think you're getting a deal here 'cos you most SINCERELY are not. You can't really be this dumb; my troll senses are humming off the charts here...Holy fuck do I wish I were into car sales 'cos you'd be the greatest sucker --- er, buyer of the DECADE!!! Whoever gets your business must love you as you freely hand over your cash without thinking about it!!! Additionally, many other stores are offering the gift-wrap option at little to no cost (with it worked in somewhere else, rest assured!!), so your argument is completely invalid. Do I have to repeat" 'TIS THE SEASON?"

"What is the price of the yoyo?????
P.S. tax free?????"

The price is still a solid 25 hard-earned singles. Oh, you meant the price of the actual, physical yoyo? Oh, okay: how's about approximately 10 cents each, plus probably the standard sea shipping from China (so divide the pittance of that amount by, what, 100,000 units? 500,000?) Fractions of a penny each to ship. Add to that the cost of the printing (usually done at the factory site or a secondary promotional facility, usually again still in China)

The price of the yoyo with printing (average maximum price, based on minimum 1000 count order) including shipping & custom printing works out to be no more than 45 cents each. And who the fuck knows what kind of deal they actually GOT!! They may have an even sweeter contract with the suppliers.

But at least it's fun, you say...for exactly 5 minutes until you figure out that all those neat tricks like Walking the Dog are harder to learn than you thought, so you figure the best use for the thing is as a weapon & go around smacking things with it. I think I have just saved you $25 for the yoyo experience. You're fucking welcome. Now go make a donation to an actual organization yourself/in person instead of assuming your mother monster will do it for you... Once you've seen employees of a company (who only accept cash donations for the food bank) count the cash behind closed doors without a FB rep there, well, you learn REAL FAST the true meaning of corporate charity & moreso, the folly of the human beings beind it all.

In closing: fuck you for making me think this much about wholesale & shit on a Saturday before I could attain the Holy Daily French Vanilla, and equally fuck you for honestly being this goddamned stupid when it comes to how retail sales work. A third and boistrously loud FUCK YOU for making me focus so goddamned much on yoyos.

As to the person who said yoyos cost $3 at the store - yep, $3 RETAIL price :)

Yo.