Billboard and Caca are both living in the past and celebrating Gaga's last No.1 hit.
Happy 3 yr b-day to Born This Way going #1! It'll always be my most important song to me. For it's message and how it brought us together.
— Goddess of Love (@ladygaga) February 25, 2014
Her most important song. A song that she ripped off and tried to pass off as her own. A pandering song with basic lyrics a three year old would understand. Can't you picture it? Circle time at a pre-school with the kids holding hands singing "My mama told me when I was young, we're all born superstars". That's how basic this song is. Except now Humpty Dumpty seems like a more appropriate soundtrack to Gaga's career.
She hasn't had a No.1 hit since Born This Way. Every single since flopped like a fish out of water struggling to breathe and her latest CD ARTPOP is a massive failure that didn't reach even the lowest of expectations. I guess she could always go back to pole dancing on the Lower East Side. I heard Luc Carl's bar is hiring.
In other news, Gaga finally admitted to wearing real fur. Her fans that wanted to believe so badly that their cult leader would never, ever wear real fur have nothing to defend her with anymore. Miss Breed Compassion (unless you're a fox, mink, sable or rabbit) has hit yet another nail in the fraud coffin. While talking to Harper's Bazaar about her space trip (which hopefully is a one way journey) the topic of Gaga's home came up. For some delusional reason, Gaga thinks the topic is controversial when in reality no one gives a crap if she owns a home or not; nor is it at the forefront of their thoughts when they wake up in the morning.
"Honey?" "Yes dear?" "What are you thinking about?" "Oh the usual. You know. Whether Lady Gaga owns a house or not? I can't get it off my mind. It's all I ever think about". Said no one EVER!
It was during that conversation with the magazine that Gaga admitted to owning real fur.
Punk wear? Please stop! Make it stop! It hurts SO BAD!! MAKE THE PAIN STOP! MY INTESTINES ARE BLEEDING AND COMING UP OUT OF MY MOUTH FROM LAUGHING SO HARD!! ARGH!!! MAKE IT STOP! So there you have it. Gaga owns a sable. A real punk rocker would never own a sable, diamonds or Mikimoto Pearls.
Perhaps a career at the Copenhagen Zoo would be a good alternative for Caca. I'm sure there's a few baby giraffes or tigers she could kill and make coats out of.
And this post wouldn't be complete unless I congratulated Lady Gaga on her latest ARTPOP achievement this era. Don't worry about not being nominated for a Grammy. Who needs that when you've been nominated for a Nickelodeon Kid's Choices Award! It must be bittersweet because although she got a nomination, she can't win here either. Katy Perry and One Direction are leading this prestigious award honour.
And in hate mail, here's one that makes total sense.
This genius took the time to cyber spank me for my views on Gaga, tells me I'm contributing to her alleged cutting, calls it cyber bulling which leads to suicide but also tells me to direct it at Bieber instead. Because he's more deserving of it? Why is it bad to do to Gaga but OK to do to Bieber?
